darker and darker

the moments of life between the smiles on my face are getting darker and darker. longer and longer. and each day gets scarier and scarier.

tonight i was the most honest i have ever been since this extended vacation from happiness. it felt good to let it out. it felt good to express for the first time.

then i was told that what i was feeling, the emotions i am experiencing are not true.

hello darkness. how long this time? how much more can i take? how much more before i'm sitting on a mound of salt created by evaporated tears that will no longer flow.


how can an emotion not be true? you're telling me i may as well be dead. over dramatic maybe? no. how dare you tell me that to have the emotions i have is wrong. how do i not feel. how do i turn that off. i only wish sooooo badly i could not have these emotions. not be capable of my passions.

i wasn't even talking about you. i wasn't even talking about troubles we once had. i was being honest about me. my journey. my lessons, my experience with passions and pain.

if i am not who i am. then who the fuck am i?

celiece